Sitting on a teak stool as the setting sun turns the mist pink, a masseuse strokes my arms with maternal care, chanting a prayer. I burst into tears.
Such is the power of massage at Ananda in the Himalayas, a world-leading Indian wellbeing retreat perched above Rishikesh, the birthplace of yoga.
I’m not sure why I’m crying. Jet lag? Flying from London to Dehradun via Delhi is an undertaking.
Or maybe it’s the sheer majesty of Ananda? It’s a former maharaja’s palace set in eucalyptus-scented Himalayan foothills, with the mystic pull of holy Rishikesh below, home of The Beatles’ 1968 spiritual awakening.
Or could it just be yet another menopausal curveball?
At 52, I’m now deep into the joy-zapping menopause, and my emotions are never far from the surface.
Anything from a minor altercation with my teen to a random dog greeting me waggily in the park unleashes the waterworks.
So when the opportunity arises to try Ananda’s hormone rebalance programme, I jump at it.
Helen Down visits Ananda in the Himalayas, a world-leading Indian wellbeing retreat
Ananda is perched above Rishikesh, the birthplace of yoga
Set in eucalyptus-scented Himalayan foothills, Ananda is a former Maharaja palace
My ‘comprehensive’ package includes two hours of treatments a day. It doesn’t sound like much, until you factor in all the extras.
Over my seven-night stay I am to have eight massages, four traditional Chinese medicine sessions, four Ayurvedic doctor consultations, one enema (less said about that, the better) and private sessions with a yoga instructor, a meditation teacher, a physiotherapist and an emotional healer.
It feels relentless. But this is serious wellness – not the type that only looks good on Instagram.
During my first doctor consultation, I’m told I have a ‘vata dosha’ – dosha being the energy type that shapes a person’s body, mind and health.
Vata dosha, apparently, means I have a dry constitution and suit a restricted diet of easy-to-digest, moist, warm foods.
Even though each meal zings with vitality and flavour, it takes a while to adjust to the limited choice and small portions.
At first, I wonder if I’ve been placed on Ananda’s weight management programme. But no.
The doctor is simply ensuring my gut will not get overloaded, because in Ayurveda it’s the foundation for bringing the body back into balance.
Over the course of her stay, Helen has eight massages scheduled, as well as four traditional Chinese medicine sessions, four Ayurvedic doctor consultations, one enema (less said about that, the better) and private sessions with a yoga instructor, a meditation teacher, a physiotherapist and an emotional healer
Helen follows the Vata dosha diet, which is restricted to easy-to-digest, moist, warm foods
I am, naively, expecting my doctor to wave a magic wand and restore the oestrogen levels of my youth, but I soon learn the Ayurvedic approach is not about such strategies (I suspect slathering myself in HRT gel is also frowned upon).
Instead, it’s about graceful acceptance while readying body and mind to tackle the challenges.
As my gut casts off my over-indulgent ways, the rest of my body is releasing tension through a massage programme.
At Ananda, massage is medicine.
As someone with lumbar disc issues, I am prescribed multiple back treatments alongside a few abdominal massages that feel like palliative care for my ovaries.
As you’d expect of a 25,000 sq ft spa favoured by King Charles, Kate Winslet and Oprah Winfrey, these massages are second-to-none. But having three on my second day leaves me utterly drained.
From chatting with fellow guests – Ananda is a great option for solo travellers – it’s not uncommon to feel this way at first.
Sugar and caffeine are strongly discouraged along with phone use.
As someone with lumbar disc issues, Helen is prescribed multiple back treatments alongside a few abdominal massages that feel like palliative care for my ovaries
Alcohol? Forget it. This, combined with a barrage of toxin-releasing massages, means the first few days can be a headache-inducing detox.
It’s why new guests wear bewildered expressions with their crisp white kurta pyjamas, but by day three they look blissed-out. Apt, given that ‘Ananda’ means bliss.
The hormone rebalance programme is big on traditional Chinese medicine. I get cupped so much my back looked like a game of Connect Four.
I also have acupuncture sessions with burning mugwort – a centuries-old women’s health medicine – placed on my stomach.
I swear those needles puncture my anxiety, because the benefits are instant.
By my third session, I feel felt deliciously giddy.
But when it comes to the emotional healing sessions (aka hypnosis) my initial scepticism turns into an unburdening exorcism of sadness.
From massages to group activities such as sound healing, I cry enough tears to fill the Ganges river that runs through Rishikesh.
‘The hormone rebalance programme is big on traditional Chinese medicine’, says Helen. ‘I get cupped so much my back looked like a game of Connect Four’
Every guest has a different experience.
Mine is intensely emotional, but cathartic. Arguably, staying somewhere as special as Ananda might make you feel this way. But I’m confident my hormone balance has shifted.
The crucial question is: will this post-retreat glow endure? Without a personal chef and masseuse it won’t be easy in the wild, but I think I’m in with a chance.
It will also require gallons of willpower – and my resolve wobbled as soon as the Air India drinks trolley rolled down the aisle.
More tellingly, I’ve decided to reduce my HRT. This is a seismic step – a sure sign Ananda has put me on the right path.
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